Kosher Food


Ah the good old Pre-Borsalino days when you only had to worry if something was Dairy or Meat! The hallmark of Borsalino Era Jews is to find more and more things to be strict about thereby giving people more and more avenues to compete for who is the most pious. Now the proper Jew must be concerned with BISHUL YISROEL, PAS YISROEL, CHALOV YISROEL, fish with meat, KEMACH YOSHON, hard cheese, soft cheese, medium cheese… A typical Borsalino Era Jew can starve to death before he figures out which food conforms to the particular kosher standard he holds with. And if there’s more than one Borsalino Era Jew in the room, nobody eats because each has to outdo the other in observance.

NU, you say, lets just become vegans and eat PARVE all the time. Simple, right – WRONG! Is it PARVE on dairy equipment, PARVE on meat equipment, PARVE on fish equipment that is in the same city with meat equipment? A person could go MESHIGA – and not just a person! Borsalino Era Jews have to worry if our dog food is Kosher! For the truly FRUM, they have Kosher Dog Food – for $35 a pound.

Borsalino Era Orthodoxy did make one thing simple however. Years ago, with no kosher certification authorities in existence, we had to do a lot of research to determine if a product was kosher. Frequently it came to a matter of trusting the merchant. Today, we can easily and readily discern the precise level of KASHRUS of a product through the HECHSHER, the mark of the certification authority placed on all kosher food packages. Almost every food has some kind of HECHSHER and there are at least 500 different and competing certifications to choose from.

Of course, most of us are unfamiliar with any HECHSHER that isn’t composed of at least one “O” and one “U” so those other 500 marks are pretty much useless. So how does having 500 competing HECHSHERS make things easy? Well, we spend so much time arguing about what certification is acceptable we don’t have time to eat. If we never eat, we never eat anything un-kosher. Simple!


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